Wednesday, December 30, 2009


I have been feeling not-so-nice for a little while now. It started whith a cold and has now morphed into some weird self-esteem thing. Nothing fits properly. I have this magical fantasy perception of what my body was like before I had my son. In my mind, I had this perfect body with no bulges or bumps that would fit into whatever jeans I wanted. I know that this is my mind playing tricks on me. In reality, my body was pretty much the same as it is now-with a few key differences. The most noticable of which is my BUTT. Shopping isn't as fun because I have these strange expectations and since I will NEVER live up to them, I will continue to get pissed every time I leave the changeroom. Sigh.

Anyway, I'm trying to pick myself up and dust myself off. This week is pretty casual because I am literally the ONLY ONE in my office. Everyone else is sipping eggnog by the freaking fire.

My lovely husband took these pictures of me this morning. I am really going to try and step it up with the photos. I look fine today I suppose. These are pretty much the only jeans that don't make me want to cry. They are 2 sizes to big because I bought them while I was pregnant. They're cute but not very practical due to the super trendy ripped situation. The sweater is adorable and I like this head wrap/scarf thing because it makes me feel like an African Princess.

Anyhoo....I hope everyone had a great holiday. Let's try and get through the winter blahs together!


  1. I feel ya girl. At two months postpartum I won't even try on most of the prepregnancy clothes in my closet, let alone shop for new ones.

    You are a beautiful queen. Kiss your bumps today then get ready to kiss them goodbye as you keep working out so diligently.

    Make the change you want to see. In the meantime, keep showing us all how to style our shapely bodies so damn well!

  2. its a journey, you are beautiful inside and out... radiating

  3. I understand the body stuff. I don't have any kids but my weight fluctuates like crazy based on how much I'll let myself eat, which of course always matches my mood =/

    I've found just dressing your body type properly will make you feel SO much better, it's amazing! I know I look a lot better in pictures than my body does in real life (and especially with I'm in a bikini!!!) but getting prettied up makes such a difference, I'll never dress ugly again!!

    I hope you had a great holiday doll! =D

  4. You are lovely, so stop wasting time thinking otherwise.

  5. I am totally there with you. When I had my first daughter, the pregnancy weight came right off. My second pregnancy, however, was a totally different story! I'm just now close to my pre-pregnancy weight a year later. And even though the scale says I weigh XXX, my boobs and thighs are definitely bigger than I remember them being before! Carrying life is a major gift and it does take time to accept your 'mommy' curves. *hugs*

  6. I hope you're feeling better by now, Onika. You look brilliant in these photos.

    I also hope you had happy holidays, whatever you celebrate!

    Happy New Year!

  7. Hey, I happen to like your butt, so don't you go badmouthing it! :)


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